He Said It Right




Season One


Pilot


"I'm not a good tour guide. I don't know anything about the White House."

"My name is Sam Seaborn and I'm the Deputy Communications Director. What does that mean exactly? Well, to begin with I'm a counselor to the President, mostly on domestic matters, though generally not security related. I work with Toby Ziegler, the Communications Director, and C.J. Cregg, the Press Secretary, on crafting our message and getting it out through the electronic and print media. And while my functions here are generally perceived to be politically skewed it's important to remember its not the D.N.C., but rather your tax dollars that pay my salary so I work for you whether you voted for us or not.... I graduated law school eight years ago and started working at Dewey-Ballantine....While there really are a great many things on which I can speak with authority, I'm not good at talking about the White House."

"Well, this is bad on so many levels."


Mr. Willis of Ohio


"I'll tell you what, let's forget about the fact that you're coming a little late to the party and embrace the idea that you showed up at all."


Enemies


"Well, uh, like most people I am an absolute nut for Chinese opera, the Chinese being known the world over for their soaring and romantic melodies.  And what with your guarantee that there won't be sex, I don't see how I can say no."


Lord John Marbury


"I'll bust you like a pinata."


Take This Sabbath Day


"Leo, there are times when we are absolutely nowhere."


Celestial Navigation


SAM: "Your teeth are the best friends you got, C.J."
C.J.: "They are?"
SAM: "You take care of them, they’ll take care of you."
C.J.: "When’d you start talking like this?"
SAM: "I’m nuts for dental hygiene."


Let Bartlet Be Bartlet


"I serve at the pleasure of President Bartlet."



Season Two


The Midterms


"Ah...Well.  That's my office over there.  And the President works in that round room over there.  And nobody else really matters.  Come on in."

"I'm just... I'm gonna take that crab puff."


In This White House


"But for a brilliant surgical team and two centimeters of a miracle, this guy's dead right now. From bullets fired from a gun bought legally.  They bought guns, they loaded them, they drove from Wheeling to Rosslyn, and until they pulled the trigger they had yet to commit a crime. I am so off-the-charts tired of the gun lobby tossing around words like 'personal freedom' and no one calling 'em on it. It's not about personal freedom, and it certainly has nothing to do with public safety. It's just that some people like guns."


The Portland Trip


"Be poets."


Bartlet's Third State of the Union


"I'm not the one who got you jumping around like Joey Heatherton"


Somebody's Going to Emergency, Somebody's Going to Jail


"It was high treason, and it mattered a great deal! This country is an idea, and one that’s lit the world for two centuries and treason against that idea is not just a crime against the living! This ground holds the graves of people who died for it, who gave what Lincoln called the last full measure of devotion. Of fidelity."


Bad Moon Rising


"I'm less visually observant than others, but I make up for it with cunning and guile."


Season Three


Manchester Part 2


"I'm not Catholic."


H.Con-172


"I don't believe in being casual with the truth."


100,000 Airplanes


"I don't know what the cool restaurant is and I don't care. . . . And I don't know where the Tommy Hilfiger party is and I don't know what to do when I get there."


 
Night Five


"I was having a good night until, like, three minutes ago."

"OK, well, I'm going to step out for a minute and... not be in this area anymore."

"I can tell you're down in the dumps but let's talk about me."


Dead Irish Writers


SAM: I'm not an instigator
CJ: Yes, you are.
SAM: Yeah, but I'm on the side of the angels.

"Listen.  This is what I do.  I get things fast."


The U.S. Poet Laureate


"For everybody who works outside the building, I'll fall on the sword. For everybody else, I WASN'T THERE!"


Enemies Foreign and Domestic


"I got a letter last year asking if I would donate my brain to a medical school in Grenada. I'll tell you, there are days when I think 'yeah why not just get it over with'?"



Season Four


20 Hours in America Part 1


"I won't let you down."


20 Hours in America Part 2


"I love Josh like a brother and he's a world-class political mind, but until today I didn't know he was smarter than I was."


Game On


"I'm a magna cum laude graduate of Princeton and editor of the Duke Law Review. Tell her I've worked for Congressmen and the D-triple-C. I have seven years at Gage Whitney, and for the last four I've served as Deputy Communications Director and Senior Counsel."

Season Seven











The Sam Seaborn Quill